I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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