Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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