I wannas sexs uuuuu
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize
