I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Randomize
