thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
