They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
