I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Mom said you looked used
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
