bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize