hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Randomize