8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
How naked do you want me to be?
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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