Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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