Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
