why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
this will be a night to untag.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Randomize
