i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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