If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
All I want is dick and wine.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
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