I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Randomize
