Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I should be sponsored by Trojan
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
either way he was missing a nipple.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
