I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
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