The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I will die if light touches me.
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
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