sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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