Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
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