I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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