loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize