it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
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