when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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