Don't you send me to vm
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Randomize
