My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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