i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
People in love make me want to vomit
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize