wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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