that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
