Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
