Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
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