I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
