In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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