Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Randomize
