I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
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