gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
She told me I should be a condom model.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Randomize
