Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
