paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
