I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
