Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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