i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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