idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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