Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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