Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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