All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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