I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
