i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
