Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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