im drinking this country out of the recession.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I would ride that face into the sunset
Randomize
